The Boss Wants to Talk
A stick figure looking at their phone with a message bubble from 'Boss' that reads 'Hey, can we chat this afternoon?'
The stick figure at their desk with sweat droplets, thought bubbles showing a pink slip, a cardboard box of desk items, and a 'YOU ARE FIRED' stamp
The stick figure in the bathroom mirror practicing a dignified exit speech with dramatic hand gestures while a coworker walks in confused
The stick figure sitting across from the boss who is smiling and pointing at a chart labeled 'New Project' while the stick figure looks stunned and relieved
A person receives a vague message from their boss saying 'can we chat?' and immediately spirals into assuming they are being fired.
Explanation
Your phone buzzes. It is a message from your boss: 'Hey, can we chat this afternoon?' Five words. No context. No emoji. And just like that, your entire career flashes before your eyes. You must be getting fired. Actually, they are probably shutting down the whole department. Actually, you have probably been bad at your job the entire time and everyone has been too polite to say anything. By the time the meeting happens, you have mentally packed your desk, updated your resume, and rehearsed a dignity-preserving exit speech. Catastrophizing thrives on ambiguity. When information is incomplete -- and 'can we chat?' is about as incomplete as it gets -- your brain fills in the gaps with the scariest possible interpretation. This is called the negativity bias at work: your brain is wired to pay more attention to potential threats than potential rewards, because in evolutionary terms, missing a threat was more dangerous than missing an opportunity. So 'can we chat?' becomes a threat until proven otherwise. Your brain does not consider that the boss might want to discuss a new project, ask your opinion on something, or even give you positive feedback. Those options do not trigger the survival system, so your brain ignores them. The next time you receive a vague message and feel the spiral starting, try this: generate three possible explanations -- one negative, one neutral, and one positive. You will notice that the neutral and positive options are just as plausible as the catastrophic one. Your brain just never bothered to present them. Catastrophizing is not your brain lying to you. It is your brain showing you only the scariest channel and pretending the remote is broken.
Key Takeaway
Your brain fills ambiguity with the worst-case scenario -- but neutral and positive explanations are usually just as likely.
A stick figure reading 'Can we chat?' from their boss and feeling the spiral start, then pausing and catching themselves
The stick figure writing three options on a notepad: 'Fired (worst), New project (neutral), Promotion (best)' and circling the neutral one
The stick figure going about their workday normally, letting the ambiguity sit without resolving it through catastrophizing
The stick figure in the meeting, learning it was about the new project, relieved and noting: 'The catastrophe happened only in my head'